Failing at Cultivating Immortality with Kids in Longhu Mountain! These 3 Pitfalls Made Me Want to Be a Taoist Priest

Sisters! Braving the summer vacation with a 6-year-old to the Taoist ancestral home, the scenery was so fairy-like it made my legs weak, but we hit so many traps we almost ascended to heaven! The kid cried fountains during the drift at Shengjing Mountain, and this old mom got sunburned and peeled like a "little crayfish"... After two days of blood, sweat, and tears organizing this tribulation survival guide, reading it can save you from needing three fewer talismans‼️

🔥 Reckless itinerary
Day 1⃣️: Yingtan North Station - drop luggage at Dandelion Hotel - roast into jerky at Elephant Trunk Hill - mosquito bites at Mosquito-Free Village - night tour chasing dreams in Longhu Mountain
Day 2⃣️: Pray for safety talisman at Zhengyi Temple - nibble tofu in Shangqing Ancient Town - find Master Zhang at the Celestial Master’s Mansion - get soaked drifting at Shengjing Mountain

🏞️ Soulful attractions:
✅ Bamboo Raft Drifting and Bumper Boats
The crystal-clear Luxi River is breathtaking! The water guns bought for the kid turned into "nuclear weapons"🔫 Just past Xianshui Rock, we collided with the neighboring boat, and the kids started a water fight. When we got off, the whole family looked like we’d been fished out of the river...

✅ Peach Blossom Isle Coffin Raising Show
The 10-meter-high zipline blew our minds! When the actor descended from the sky, the kid covered her eyes and shouted, "Mom, they’re playing human kites!"🪁 After the show, she insisted on folding the ticket into a paper coffin to hold a funeral for her Barbie doll...

✅ Shengjing Mountain 4D Drift
Two hours of screaming and getting soaked! The rapids stuck the boat in a rock crevice, and when the lifeguard pulled the boat, the kid’s slipper floated downstream...🌊 At the end, carrying my drenched kid down the mountain, she was still shouting, "One more time! My slipper will turn into a boat!"

💥 Deadly pitfalls:
1⃣️ Don’t go to Elephant Trunk Hill in the afternoon! The stone slabs are hot enough to fry eggs, and the kid’s sandal soles melted right off.
2⃣️ Don’t trust the name "Mosquito-Free Village"! Sprayed half a bottle of mosquito repellent, but the kid still got seven big bites on her legs.
3⃣️ Don’t wear light-colored clothes for drifting! When wet, they become as transparent as the Emperor’s New Clothes.
4⃣️ Don’t let kids touch the Taoist statues! The moment the little hand reached out, the Taoist priest glared and made it pull back.
5⃣️ Don’t buy bamboo tube rice in the scenic area! The glutinous rice is so hard it could be a hidden weapon; the kid said it felt like chewing "Taishang Laojun’s alchemy furnace."

🍜 Foodie hits and misses:
✔️ Shangqing Ancient Town’s lamp wick cake, soft, glutinous, and sweet, the kid stole three pieces.
✔️ Chestnut braised chicken near the Celestial Master’s Mansion, the chestnuts were so sweet the kid wanted to bury the pits as family heirlooms.
✔️ Yanshan hot noodles with tiger skin eggs, so fresh the kid drank every drop of soup.
✖️ Popular Taoist health tea: 38 yuan for a bark-flavored drink, the kid said it tasted like "monster foot bath water."
✖️ Scenic area sticky rice cakes: so hard they hurt teeth, ended up as skipping stones.

📸 Perfect photo spots:
1⃣️ Elephant Trunk Hill boardwalk (pretend to touch the elephant’s trunk)
2⃣️ Bamboo raft dock (wear a bamboo hat for a martial arts movie vibe)
3⃣️ Celestial Master’s Mansion thousand-year-old arhat pine (hold the kid as a little Taoist apprentice)
4⃣️ Dream-chasing show light display (add flying special effects for epic shots)

🏡 Accommodation hits and misses:
✔️ Dandelion Hotel: gave the kid a little feather duster toy, the pool has mountain views and is super healing.
✔️ Ancient town guesthouse: carved wooden bed let the kid play "Princess Pearl" all night.
✖️ Inn next to a Taoist temple: mosquitoes held a symphony, and midnight bell ringing scared us out of our souls.

⚠️ Lifesaving essentials:
✔️ Kids’ buoyancy vest (hug tight in rapids for safety)
✔️ Foldable palm fan (cool off and shoo mosquitoes while queuing at temples)
✔️ Quick-dry Taoist robe (perfect for photos and cultivation)
✔️ Waterproof earplugs (block the kid’s continuous screams during shows)

On the high-speed train, the kid suddenly said, "Mom, let’s steal a Taoist priest home!" Although every day was a cycle of apologies and reapplying sunscreen, seeing her hair full of "immortal crane feathers" made this tribulation worthwhile!

(❗️Final warning: bring ten pairs of socks for the kid! Five pairs get soaked during drifting, two pairs lost during the temple shoe-off ritual, and in the end, she walked the whole trip barefoot in shoes...)