🚣♀️ Bruges: Where Canals Sparkle, Chocolate Rules & I Almost Became a Swan’s Snack 🦢

Hey wander squad! Just back from Bruges—aka the “Venice of the North”—where I floated past storybook houses, ate chocolate for breakfast (no shame), and had a *very* tense standoff with a swan. Let’s dive into this medieval daydream!

**First Impressions:** Bruges is what happens when Disney designs a UNESCO site. Cobblestone streets glow like honey under lantern light, canals mirror pastel-painted facades, and the air smells like waffles, fresh waffles, and… *more waffles*. The bell tower’s chime? That’s the town’s ringtone. 📯

**Hidden Gem Alert 🔍:** Skip the crowded Markt Square and sneak into **Bonifacius Bridge** at dawn. It’s a tiny, ivy-clad stone arch with canal views so perfect, you’ll question if you’re still on Earth. Pro tip: Go early to avoid the ’Grammers.

**Swan Drama 🦢:** While snapping pics at **Minnewater Lake**, a majestic swan mistook my croissant for a peace offering. It charged, wings spread like a feathered WWE wrestler. I surrendered the pastry. *Bruges 1, Me 0.*

**Foodie Heaven 🍫:** At **The Chocolate Line**, I tried “wasabi chocolate” (sounds wild, tastes *genius*). But the real MVP? **Frites** from **Chez Vincent**—crispy, salty, dunked in *samurai sauce* (mayo + sriracha). Napkins mandatory.

**24 Hours in Bruges ⏰** (because time machines aren’t real… yet):
- **8 AM:** Belgian waffles at **Li O Lait**—go *spekuloos* spread + strawberries. 🧇
- **10 AM:** Climb the **Belfry Tower** (366 steps = leg day on steroids). Views = *chef’s kiss*.
- **12 PM:** Canal boat tour! Guides roast tourists *and* history. 🚤
- **2 PM:** Lunch at **Soup** (yes, that’s the name). Bread bowl + tomato soup = cozy vibes. 🍅
- **4 PM:** Wander **Beguinage**—white cottages, nuns, and serenity. Breathe. 🙏
- **7 PM:** Flemish beef stew at **Tom’s Diner**—slow-cooked, beer-braised, *heaven*.
- **9 PM:** Nightcap at **’t Brugs Beertje**—ask for a *Brugse Zot* ale.

**Pro Tips:**
➜ **Comfy shoes >>> style**—cobblestones are ankle assassins.
➜ **Learn “Dank je”** (thank you)—Flemish hearts melt when you try.
➜ **Swans are not your friends**—trust me.

Bruges, you’re a caramel-dipped daydream. My step count’s insane, my jeans are tighter, but my soul? *Fed.*

*DM me for swan negotiation tactics… or where to find emergency stretchy pants. 🍫✨*

**P.S.** If you *don’t* come home smelling like chocolate and beer… did you even go? 🍻